Tuesday, 3 May 2011

Is it wrong to remain silent after a long talk?

Hiya. [The title is weird ey?] 

I happened to think about this after encountered with bunch of weirdos [As if you are not one of'em eyy?]. Yes, bunch of weirdos. Let's do some flashback, shall we?

Back then, when I was in school age, not mature and easily annoyed. Okay, in simple words, I am too easy to get angry and pissed off. Understand? [Nod your head lah!]. Yes, as I said I am easily pissed off. My emotions are unstable. I am deprived of patience back then. When I was in primary school, I happened to throw a duster straight to my classmate's mouth and it bleed. IT BLEED, man! But, one thing for sure, I don't remember the reason of the accident [no prove that I am doing wrong] but it is not that bad and I pitied him now. Sadis '--

And, when I was in secondary school, I am a rebel. An extremist in the history of rebel, I should say. Yes, I do things which you think is impossible to be done by a girl. A naive, innocent girl [but I'm not!]. I punched a guy in the face, I pushed this one very bitch to the wall, I slapped some girls, I kicked people. You name it, I did most of everything. Things which are hardcore, brutal, out-of-mind.

Okay. Now back to 2011. When I was in UTHM [actually, I am still in UTHM until this upcoming Saturday], I learn to be patient. Yes, and it need a lot of patient to gain patience. Get it? To change, it needs a lot of effort, and strength. People around you can't accept your changes without being sarcastic or insults. This is what I can conclude when I am trying to change. [As you can see, I am trying to be more patient.].

M : F, rapat ehh dengan Ainaa?
F : Boleh laa. Kenapa ehh?
M : Tahan pulak dengan dia? Kan panas baran budak tu ~ and babbled all the way

And then F told me the whole story and I was like WTH! If only I could strangled M till she choked and drop dead. See, things like this makes my life is tougher than before.

And, I happened to think that not all the spare times should be filled with conversation. And yet, some people don't think the same. Which include the bunch of weirdos which I mentioned before. Lately, I sensed that they were doing things which I am not fond of [scream, talking in the highest octave, and etc]. And, to show that I don't like that, I remained silent and pretend like as if I am alone in that room and I do pretty much I want as long as it doesn't disturb them. But, in the end, I always ask myself, until when can I hold up the anger? I should either spill it out or just let it be the way it should be.

And yet, I still haven't decide anything yet.

PS Silence is gold. But sometimes, speech is more useful than silence, don't you think?

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